Nuclear Fallout or just a Damp Squib?

Following on from my post “Let Battle Commence” the last couple of days have been something of a roller-coaster ride.

Whilst I am still reeling from the blatant inaccuracies and malicious character assassination I have also forced myself to back-step on to an objective platform. In the face of adversity it is necessary to approach problems with a cool head and rational thought.

I take full responsibility for allowing myself to be naive and have contacted my three older children to offer my heartfelt apologies for any embarrassment. Thus far, two have responded positively and I can’t explain how much that means to me. It would have been so easy for them to take umbrage but I am proud to say that they are intelligent and discerning young adults who do not follow the crowd and are fearless in making their own decisions.


Not so my former spouse who has now taken it upon himself to block my contact with our younger daughters. I liken this action to a petulant child who will not share their toys. Children should never be used as weapons under any circumstances and, while I can accept that he feels that his fragile ego has been assaulted, I cannot and will not accept this cruel and juvenile punishment.







On a lighter note I received a disc of the photographs taken for the article form the photographer. This pleased me largely due to the fact that there are some rather beautiful shots of mine and Nicks’ young son (better known as Pesky Kid to my regular readers). There is also interest from two magazines who wish to print a “right to reply” feature but, as you can appreciate, the “once bitten twice shy” maxim applies at this moment in time.

My Face book page has been largely uneventful. An acquaintance did post to voice her disapproval and exit from my social sphere. and I replied amicably respecting her wishes. No great loss and I am sure she will get over her shock by buying herself a new pair of shoes or the latest Heat Magazine. On the other hand I have received lots of support from those close enough to me to know the true account and they share my indignation. Big thanks and hugs to H, E, T and L ,you know who you are. 😉

I suppose, judging by the 300+ online article comments, that we have a long way to go before people stop believing everything they read in the paper and even further to accept that a contributing Non Resident Mother who has regular, positive contact with her children is not an “absent” mother who has “”abandoned” her offspring. As it stands I remain a pariah, a taboo and, in many peoples eyes, unworthy to use the title of Mother and , quite frankly, reading that twisted and sensationalist article, I can’t say I totally blame them.

It only remains to be seen if my ex spouse carries out his threat, it is not the first time he has done this. Not seeing the girls is agony for me… so I’m hoping for the Damp Squib. The alternative is just too unbearable to contemplate.

Until next time




“I look only to the good qualities of men. Not being faultless myself, I won’t presume to probe into the faults of others”. Mohandas Gandhi


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. martcibe
    Aug 07, 2009 @ 18:33:32

    just read the Mail article. Oh my goodness, I had no idea that you were in the middle of any of this. It must be incredibly stressful.

    Firstly, I want to say that I think it is absolutely impossible for anyone to judge you unless they have walked in your shoes and know what you felt and what you have been through. No one but you fully understands your situation.

    Secondly, I think there are definitely double-standards as regards the way women and men are judged in relation to family life, and quite frankly it stinks. For all kinds of reasons people leave old relationships and start new ones, dads doing it tend to go unquestioned in a way that mums do not.

    Thirdly, the Mail…urrrggghhhh…they are horrid and have a massive agenda.

    So sorry to hear it’s all gone a bit mental. Please let me know if I can help in anyway with setting the record straight.

    Best wishes to you both X


  2. coffeewithkate
    Aug 07, 2009 @ 20:20:15

    Thank you Martyn. It is heartening to know that there are people out there who can remain objective.

    This article confirms for me that my decision, many years ago, to drop out of training at the Yorkshire Evening Post was the right one. 🙂



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