The Fall of the Domestic Goddess.

Proof that housework is bad for your health.

During a rather rigorous bout of hoovering I accidentally punched the door frame. After screaming a few choice expletives I examined my bleeding knuckles and, being a tough Yorkshire lass, decided that my outburst had been a tad extreme. However, an hour later, I find that I am still in terrible pain and that my middle finger is badly swollen. Even the act of typing this mini-blog causes me to wince.

The moral of this tale?

Hire a bloody cleaner!!!

f u c k

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“Killing Pingu”…my greatest work.

We shouldn’t do it but, inevitably, we fall into the trap of negativity and lose faith in our ability to create. For example, I perused two wonderful blogs this morning, the inspired Mrs Frys’ Diary and fellow York writer Martyn Clayton’s excellent blog “Rich Tea and Empathy”. In comparison my own offerings seem somewhat banal and therefore not in the least bit interesting to the blogging community. I sank into my coffee in a depressive fog.

I wasn’t to languish for long. Ironically the next blog I came across gave me all the answers to life, the universe and everything. OK…I am exaggerating slightly (and we already know that the answer is 42) but it gave me the impetus to step up my game.

Here’s the link http://www.dailyblogtips.com/increase-blog-traffic/

Now I’m off to do some research for future articles… starting with “Killing Pingu; My Top Ten Torture Methods”.

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No Cappuccinos for Kate :-(

Well it has been a terribly tight month and, as it draws to a close, I find myself scanning the deepest, darkest recesses of the cupboards. My personal challenge for this week is to buy in enough for 3 main meals and 5 lunches for two and a half people on a budget of £12. All social events have been cancelled until further notice so no cappuccinos for Kate I fear!!! 😦

The one advantage to writing is that it costs me next to nothing to do it. The downside however is that  it means that I rarely get to venture outdoors. Time to dust off the flask and the lunch boxes for some cheap trips to the park with Pesky Kid

Just to clarify, Pesky Kid is the affectionate name for our son and heir. It originated from my time in the labour ward when, two days before Christmas, a midwife (wearing rather bizarre flashing reindeer earrings) attempted to distract me from the excruciating pain by putting Scooby Doo on the TV. “And I would have gotten away with it too if it hadn’t have been for you pesky kids” was the last thing I heard before screaming out for the pethidine.

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The Art of Procrastination

After spending countless hours, not to mention pints of blood , sweat and tears setting up my blog, I find that I have been struck down by the dreaded Procrastinators Syndrome. 

Beware fellow bloggers, it is highly contagious. Symptoms include:

1) a strong urge to sit in ones pyjamas all day

2) over-usage of the excuse “oh, I’ll do it tomorrow”

3) spending excessive hours on Face book

Should you begin to experience these symptoms you must shut down your computer immediately and go for a long walk. This will release chemicals in your brain to help combat the creative fugue. Upon returning to your computer you must then log in to Dr Wickeds’ Write or Die application (DrWicked.com) and free-write on Kamikaze mode for at least one hour!!!

Oh, and please remember to change out of your PJ’s before you embark on the aforementioned long walk. Failure to do so may result in total embarrassment.

naked man

Poetry and Penguins.

What a busy week!!! Our website is up an running now at  http://kateboardman.co.uk/ , Nic is busy posting articles on Squidoo (please check  it out and rate him at http://squidoo.com/tunisiandreams) and I’m writing my first blog.

Today was Pesky Kids’ last day at pre-school. Deep joy. Seven whole weeks of trying to find interesting (and hopefully free) activities to keep us both occupied. Luckily the Netmums website (www.netmums.co.uk) is full of ideas and information. My social diary is looking very healthy at the moment. 🙂

On Monday I met my Creative Writing Tutor in Borders and begged her for some “homework” as my creative urge has been a bit sluggish lately. She obliged and gave so many  tasks I almost wished I’d kept my mouth shut. Monday being Nics’ day off, I had every intention of  starting my homework straight away only to get distracted on setting up the website and blog. Well…it is sort of writing isn’t it? 😉

Tuesday was a complete write off (pardon the pun). Pesky Kid was in a major pester mode and I felt as though my head was going to explode at any moment. The only joy I had that day was when I logged on to My Writers Circle (http://www.mywriterscircle.com) and read the complimentary reviews on my poem and short story. The members are really great people who are always willing to help out be it with motivation, information or critique. Be warned though, this is not some clap happy, feel good critiquing…it’s the real deal and not for the fainthearted.

Wednesday wasn’t nuch better. My plans were literally rained off and poor PK had a bit of a dodgy stomach. 😦 Our picnic in the park was reluctantly cancelled. I tried to get some words down on paper but it just wasn’t happening so I worked on the website again and then lost myself on Facebook. I really should nip this Facebook fetish in the bud…I mean, how am I ever going to win the Nobel Prize for Literature if all I’m doing is discussing baby poop online? 

Thursday started off promising. I was made admin on two Facebook sites and spent the whole morning setting up and coordinating local events. I’m now also a member of York Flash Mob Creative Geniuses (more on that when the website is up and running). When PK arrived back home from pre-school I was subjected to an hour of Pingu…(I hate tha bl***y penguin), but then (oh joy of joys) I substituted it for the animated movie Surfs Up and he watched the whole DVD from start to finish. Ok, I am aware that Surfs Up contains lots of penguins too but they are not annoying little sh**s like Pingu. That evening I finally forced myself off Facebook and did some freewriting for an hour. One thousand words later I went to bed feeling like I had actually achieved something. 🙂

Until Monday.

Kate

XXX

 

Please leave feedback on my blog, I would appreciate it so much. Any comments/criticisms are greatfully recieved and will assure me that I’m not just talking to myself!!! 😛

Blog Launch: Friday!!!

Friday is to be my regular blog spot so be sure to tune in. All comments/feedback welcome (as long as its nice).  🙂

Kate has finally joined the Technological Age!!!